Hi friends! A lot has happened since my 28th week of pregnancy! Wow! I went through a lot of anxiety for a while. Something just clicked inside of me and I realized holy crap I’m having a baby in a couple of months! I panicked a little bit. I also had so much on my plate and felt like I had a time limit to get things completed. Any new mom’s feel that way? It’s like I only have until our baby is here and then that’s it! Times up! I kept feeling like everything had to get done before his arrival.
As the weeks went on everything started to sink in and I accepted my thoughts and feelings. This baby is coming whether we are ready or not! I had a lot of quiet time with the Lord and finally I feel at peace. Things won’t be perfect and that’s something I need to accept and move forward with. I have always been a perfectionist but I believe being a parent you won’t ever be perfect. Something I’m going to have to get used to.
In these last few weeks with the anxiety my blood pressure sky rocketed and my doctor decided she wanted to see me twice a week. She thought I was at risk for preeclampsia which freaked me out even more. I also had to take the glucose test which I was dreading! Of course just my luck when taking the glucose test I was 5 minutes late and they wouldn’t take my blood. So I had to drink that awful drink a second time and come back in to get my blood drawn (I made sure I was really early this time). My test results came back and I failed the glucose test so lucky me I had to go take the 3 hour test. Pretty much the worst few weeks I’ve had in a while. Being pregnant, fasting for 8 hours and drinking that nasty drink is a nightmare. Thank goodness I got through the 3 hours and 4 blood draws without passing out or vomiting! My results came back and I passed. Thank goodness!
With my good test results and no protein in my urine (which they check every time I go in) my doctor realized I had anxiety due to being at the doctor’s office. Not preeclampsia. Just a case of white coat syndrome. She has had me monitor my blood pressure at home and it’s been perfectly fine so she changed my two appointments to just one a week. This has calmed my anxiety down so much! Knowing I don’t have to be there twice a week.
I knew already I had white coat syndrome. My past experiences going to the doctors was never good. I always got bad news. So being traumatized from all the bad news in the past makes me super anxious each time I go to my doctors. I never knew until now how high it made my blood pressure! Pretty crazy.
After 3 weeks or so of normal good appointments I hit 35 weeks and my 2 appointments a week started again. Even though my doctor knows the cause of my high blood pressure I am still a high risk patient. So each week I have one ultrasound and 2 non stress tests to keep an eye on baby. Knowing I’m in the home stretch I am so excited and instead of being nervous for my appointments they’re actually something I look forward to because I get to see my little guy. He’s doing great by the way!
In the last few weeks I have started using Essential Oils from Young Living. I was skeptical at first (thought it was just a fad) but they actually work! A good friend of mine gave me some samples and they have helped me so much! Mostly with stress and anxiety which I deal with the most. I look forward to using more of their oils for other things. You guys need to try them! Seriously they work wonders!
I am now almost 36 weeks pregnant and I can honestly say I am ready for this baby to be here! I’m excited, the nursery is done, bags are packed and we are now just waiting for Brayden to make his appearance! I had a doctor’s appointment the other day and was told Brayden is 6.5 pounds and average weight right now is 5.25! He’s growing pretty fast. I had an ultrasound and looked forward to seeing his face in 3D but of course he was covering his face with both arms! Little stinker. I also had my non stress test and he was moving around like crazy! He’s healthy, active and already has such a personality. Every non stress test and ultrasound I have everyone always tells me he looks perfect. Not just good but perfect. Which is music to my ears! My doctor checked my cervix this week and it’s completely closed. Which is good because he needs to cook a little longer. I was almost hoping I was dilating a little bit because I want him to be here already!
As far as an update on how I’m doing… I’m pretty much a zombie. I feel huge. I don’t get much sleep. I wake up every hour to go to the bathroom and I also wake up constantly to turn over because my hips hurt so bad. It’s been extremely painful getting out of bed because my pelvis and cervix area is so sore. My body is definitely changing and I can feel it. I can’t do much of anything anymore without getting winded and having to sit down and rest. It’s definitely a struggle but knowing I’m so close to the finish line keeps me going!
Recently I started having contractions. I didn’t even realize I was having them until one of my non stress tests. The nurse pointed them out to me on the paper and I was overjoyed. It was awesome to see! She told me when I was having one and I felt my stomach tightening at the same time. I knew right away it wasn’t Brayden pushing against me (which is what I thought the contractions were) they were real contractions. They also made it clear that they aren’t Braxton Hicks. These contractions happen close together and don’t stop when I move positions. They also make a change in the cervix. I believe this is pretty rare but it’s the body’s way of preparing for the baby to come. The same day I had this non stress test I went to the mall with my mother-in-law to do some more baby shopping. Walking around all day actually made my contractions worse and they started getting more intense and closer together. When I got home my mother-in-law helped me time them and we started freaking out. We felt like Brayden was on his way! We went and got our bags and went to the hospital. After a few hours in the hospital they sent me home because they said it wasn’t actual labor. I wasn’t in enough pain. They also checked my cervix and it was only dilated to a one. For me that was awesome to hear though because that meant things were progressing!
That same week I believe I lost my mucus plug. I bled for a few days and my contractions would come and go every day. This was pretty nerve wrecking because I felt like baby could come at any moment. I wondered if I should walk more or do things to speed up the process. Then I would think maybe I should rest and try to slow down the process because it’s too early. I spoke to my doctor a few times on the phone and she told me she didn’t think anything would happen soon. My body was just slowly preparing for Brayden’s arrival. So I’ve been trying to just relax and get through the next 4 weeks.
God continues to remind me of how blessed we are. Just the other day I was thinking about what I’ve gone through and how this baby inside of me is meant to be here. I can’t wait for that day to tell Brayden my struggle to have a baby and that God wanted him to be here. I think about the day I was told it would be hard for me, almost impossible, to get pregnant. How hard it was to hear that. When I didn’t have a period for months and thought how will I ever get pregnant if I can’t even ovulate? God knew Brayden before he was born and wanted me to be his mom. He had it all planned from the beginning. It’s an amazing story and testimony and honestly I wouldn’t have things any other way. God is strengthening me and showing me he is in control. I’m so glad he’s in control because if I was in control wow I’d be a mess!
Cody and I are so ready to be parents and counting down the days! Pregnancy is a beautiful thing but so hard. At least it has been for me. Hard on my body and mind but oh what a blessing and miracle!
Thanks so much for stopping by!
I’m hoping next time I share Brayden will be here!